RUNNING – By Olumide Akinlaja

For a couple of weeks now, I’ve been contemplating on jogging in the early hours of each day just to cut down on this developing fat, and get in top shape, because this revolution may actually be closer than we think and as someone who wishes to be in the cavalry, I need to build dem muscles and be ready now.

I also heard girls are obsessed with guys who are in top physical conditions, maybe that’s why the theme of this mission as at the time of birthing it was ‘Whatever it Takes’.
After much procrastinations, I decided to give it a go today. I got up around 5:30am and I hit the road from Onipanu, and I told myself I won’t stop until I get to Yaba. After all, no be the same thing wey those people dey do? Like my people would say, ‘Awon obinrin ateyin to na nse’. This means there was no excuse for me at all.
So, I set out and the first five minutes were great, but after that, I started feeling like my thighs were on fire. As I was trying to get over that, I realized I may be feeling dizzy already, and my eyes not mine to control again. I was supposed to stop, but at this moment, I noticed some young boys around me.

They should be 15, maybe 14 or 16 sef, and they were making light work of what is nearly killing me. Seeing this, the Ondo boy in me urged me on, you can’t stop here while these small boys go on, you would only make a mockery of yourself. Kama ri, oun ni Paulu wi.

So I continued.
I soldiered on, in fact, I tried to compete with those boys even if it was killing me, and I was so elated when they made a detour at a corner just before Fadeyi, at least I could go at my own pace now. I continued for another few minutes, but as I moved past Fadeyi, something else happened, and this time, it was as if a wire was disconnected within me. I was grasping for breathe, Ogbeni, mo ya stop jeje, mo fi ikale si. Immediately, something was telling me that, this guy you have fucked up o. Se efun ni abi edi? You could have stopped a long while ago, why is there need to carry on when you know your body couldn’t get on with it? Immediately, I remembered what Kelvin Ukhurebor said a few days ago after he tried the same thing, Olumide, you have nothing to prove to anyone. Oga, if revolution come, we go do am like this sef, if we can’t run, I would contact my Babalawos to give me ‘EGBE’ or ‘AFEERI’, and for the girls, they would have to learn to love me without my biceps o.
I started sauntering back home and as I regain my posture, I realized I actually loved the little moment I spent on the jogging and I thought the problem I had was trying to do too much as a beginner. So, I’ve decided that unlike Kelvin, I’m not going to give up. I would still go tomorrow and the day after, and the day after that.

I think I have something to prove to myself, so I’d continue. NB: I still don’t want the biceps though. So, I’m sending this to all the experienced runners out there, if you have any tips for me that could make the process easier, be kind enough to share.
Yes, you didn’t think I would just walk straight back into my house like that, did you? As I approached my compound, I started running again, and the vigor with which I was going about it, even Usain Bolt couldn’t have had anything on me. They need to know I went jogging nau, abi what is the point? I’m lying on my couch as I type; exhausted and beaten but definitely not out.


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